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CHAPTER III.

BEAMINGS OF HOPE.

THE following chapter, like the preceding, exhibits the movements of Mr. Caughey's mind, but under more encɔuraging circumstances. The pious reader will find many useful hints in the quaintly-expressed meditations of our journalist.

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Dec. 11. Good news from our spiritual troops! Last night's adventure quite awakened them out of their deceitful dream. Their human confidences,- Jer. 2: 37,their trusts in an arm of flesh, have died the death! My refusing to preach, though in the pulpit, came like a thunder-clap! Such a thing was not thought of, was heard of. They had fully expected a great revival, and was this to be the end of it? It was quite overruled for good; for though there was the appearance of grief, or impatience, or self-will, or wounded pride and vanity, or precipitation, and some were stumbled and offended, yet the really spiritual part took it to heart, were alarmed, fled to their closets, betook them to prayer! Some prayed part of the night, I understand; others, most of the night, and a few, all night! Praise our God! This will do! The crisis is past!

As to self, last night I went to my knees, also, with sighs and groans. But, taking up my pocket-Bible, my

eye rested on the old promise given me of the Lord, on first catching a glimpse of England's shores, as we neared the coast from America. This was it. Isa. 33: 16, 20. O, I remember that moment! Standing on the deck of the steamer, Bible in hand, as England rose out of the waves, I opened it upon that passage, which was sweetly applied to my heart. I felt assured the Lord would be with me in that strange land. It has often been a comfort to me since, when in any trouble. Last night it sweetly soothed me. I closed the book, and believed. It was oil upon the troubled waves within. But soon sorrow and sighing came over me again, like a sea. I laid down,

where sorrow sighed itself to sleep, And man, o'erlabored with his being's strife, Shrinks to that sweet forgetfulness of life."

I arose this morning refreshed, but to groan and sigh and pray.

And now, what shall I say? Is the hand of God in all this? Is the affair between Christ and us? Have the people been trusting in an arm of flesh? And has the arm of flesh been trusting in the people?— Jer. 17: 5. They relying upon my past successes, and hoping for popularity, which came not; and I trusting in their wonted zeal and ability. Then it was right we should be mutually disappointed and humbled together. Farmers sometimes speak of "catching the tail of a shower," have we just caught the tail of that curse? "Thus saith the Lord: Cursed be the man that trusteth in man, and maketh flesh his arm, and whose heart departeth from the Lord!"—Jer. 17: 5. Let us humble ourselves before the Lord, lest the curse come round again as a deprecated shower does sometimes, giving "the head and front" of its offending,

instead of the tail. If I have been trusting in self, or pulpit preparation, it is well I should know it, confess and repent before the Lord. He will humble us all, till we learn to trust in himself alone. "Salvation is of the Lord," therefore the glory should be all his own. Trust verified in man is apt to bring glory to man, or largely divides the glory due to God alone. This he will not bear; but will either punish for it afterwards, or crush in the beginning, as we would a young viper in the shell, that we may learn not to think of men or of self above that which is written.

God will not part with his glory; he has said, "My glory will not I give to another." He gives us life and health, and food, raiment and knowledge, wealth, distinction and influence, if need be, and friends, and pardon, his Spirit, and holiness, and happiness, and success in his work, yea, himself, and will share his heaven with us; but he will not give us his GLORY! It is right, my Lord, it is right! Amen to what my Lord doth say! Amen to what he has done and does!

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He ever calls upon us to cease from man, and to trust only in himself for victory. To this reduction of all human confidences God has evidently brought us all at this crisis. If we sink from him, also, as it sometimes happens, abandoning all hope for a revival now, and ceasing all ́effort, then the chastisement has not been sanctified. In this case Satan's evil will has its way; the advantage is on his side, and further humblings are to be expected.

Let me examine myself, try my own self, know my motives. Is there any energy in my soul? Surely I have not backslidden. These tours, even to recruit health, are dangerous, I am aware. The soul is apt to lose its fine edge-its secret power with God may be weakened by travelling about in strange countries, and among a people

of a strange language; it may become soft and effeminate, unwilling to endure hardness, and to become a fool for Christ; unbelief may tinge the spirit, and many other enervating thoughts. What sayest thou, my soul? Judge thyself, that thou be not judged; condemn thyself, if need be, that thou mayest not be condemned. Let me say, with an ancient Christian and preacher, "Go up, my soul, into the tribunal of conscience, there set thyself before thyself, hide not thyself behind thyself, lest God bring thee forth before thyself." Is there life within? A dead fish, if cast into a stream, will go with the stream; but a living fish will stem it. What is wanting? O, I want more of God, and more faith and love.

Cecil says, faith is the master-spring of a minister; he sees hell before him, and thousands of souls shut up there in everlasting agonies; he beholds Jesus Christ standing forth to save men from rushing into this bottomless abyss; he feels himself sent to proclaim his ability and love; he wants no fourth idea; every fourth idea is contemptible,every fourth idea is a grand impertinence. I beg pardon, Mr. Cecil, but another idea rushes upon me with irresistible force,-I want more love, fire sent down from heaven into my soul, a signal baptism of the Holy Ghost, to enable me to believe and feel the full force of those three great ideas to which earth and heaven might well assent with acclamations! Feigned zeal is false zeal, as painted fire is no fire; it warms nobody, burns nobody. It is easy to be what one really is, and safe and pleasant too. One is natural then; the contrary is but acting, feigning a character, which, by the grace of God, I never will. Amen.

Let me get a fresh glimpse of God, of Jesus, of heaven, of hell; so certain, so near, as to say, with a minister now in Paradise "Yonder glory! Yonder flames!" pointing

directly thitherward, as if he saw them plainly with his eyes. O, I must,—yes, I must preach with just such a vivid faith; must imitate my blessed Lord and Master himself, who, as Mr. Harris says, entered into the busy mart of the world, where nothing was heard but the monotonous hum of the traders, and, lifting up his voice like the trump of God, he sought to break the spell which infatuated them, while he exclaimed, "What is a man profited if he gain the whole world, and lose his own soul? or, what will a man give in exchange for his soul?"--who brought the sinners of his day to the threshold of the infinite, and showed it flushed in one part with living glories, and in another burning with fiercest flames of wrath; while he assured them that in one or other of these states they would shortly be fixed forever! Ay! this is the sort of preaching that is wanting in this nineteenth century! God help me! I must imitate my Lord, then! and I must have clearer views of the cross, too; a higher estimate of the value of the soul; more vivid views of its peril; a burning, consuming ardor for the glory of God, and the salvation of souls. These principles are linked together like chain-shot, which sweep everything before them. O, thou eternal Spirit, charge the chambers of my soul with them! Think of these things, O my soul! As in the days of martyrdom, so now,

"Mighty are the soul's commandments

To support, restrain, or raise."

Friday afternoon, Dec. 11th. My soul engages itself with God. "But I gave myself to prayer," says the Psalmist; or, as an old writer renders it, "But I prayer." As if he had said, "I and prayer are one; my whole being has resolved itself into prayer; my heart, my hopes and

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