length, so powerfully drawn towards the Lord, that having gained a retired and secret nook in the corner of a field, I kneeled down under a bank and poured forth my complaints before him. It pleased my Saviour to hear me, so that this oppression was taken off, and I was enabled to trust in him that careth for the stranger, to roll my burden upon him, and to rest assured, that wheresoever he might cast my lot, the God of all consolation would still be with me. But this was not all. He did for me more than either I had asked or thought.

my

"The next day I went to church for the first time after recovery. Throughout the whole service, I had much to do to restrain my emotions, so fully did I see the beauty and the glory of the Lord. My heart was full of love to all the congregation, especially to those in whom I observed an air of sober attention. A grave and sober person sat in the pew with me; him I have since seen and often conversed with, and have found him a pious man, and a true servant of the blessed Redeemer. While he was singing the psalm, I looked at him, and observing him intent on his holy employment, I could not help saying in my heart, with much emotion, 'Bless you, for praising Him whom my soul loveth!

"Such was the goodness of the Lord to me, that he gave me the oil of joy for mourning, and the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness;' and though my voice was silent, being stopped by the intenseness of what I felt, yet my soul sung within me, and even leaped for joy. And when the gospel for the day was read, the sound of it was more than I could well support. Oh, what a word is the word of God, when the Spirit quickens us to receive it, and gives the hearing ear, and the understanding heart! The harmony of heaven is in it, and discovers its author. The parable of the prodigal son was the portion. I saw myself in that glass so clearly, and the loving kindness of my slighted and forgotten Lord, that the whole scene was realized to me, and acted over in my heart.

"I went immediately after church to the place where I had prayed the day before, and found the relief I had there received was but the earnest of a richer blessing. How shall I express what the Lord did for me, except by saying, that he made all his goodness to pass before me. I seemed to speak

to him face to face, as a man conversing with his friend, except that my speech was only in tears of joy, and groanings which cannot be uttered. I could say, indeed, with Jacob, not how dreadful,' but how lovely, is this place! This is none other than the house of God.'"

His mind had now recovered its elasticity, and when not engaged in devotional feelings, its natural sportiveness. On the Monday he resumed with his friend Hill an intercourse which from their boyhood till his death was never interrupted, while he was capable of correspondence. Mr. Hill had attended with friendly care to his affairs during his illness, and "the only recompense I can make," says Cowper, "is to tell you that by the mercy of God I am restored to perfect health, both of mind and body. This I believe will give you pleasure, and I would gladly do any thing from which you could receive it.

"I have a lodging that puts me continually in mind of our summer excursions; we have had many worse, and except the size of it), (which, however, is sufficient for a single man), but few better. I am not quite alone, having brought a servant with me from St. Alban's, who is the very mirror of fidelity and affection for his master. And whereas the Turkish Spy says, he kept no servant, because he would not have an enemy in his house, I hired mine, because I would have a friend. Men do not usually bestow these encomiums on their lackeys, nor do they usually deserve them; but I have had experience of mine, both in sickness and in health, and never saw his fellow.

"The river Ouse, I forget how they spell it, is the most agreeable circumstance in this part of the world; at this town, it is I believe as wide as the Thames at Windsor; nor does the silver Thames better deserve that epithet, nor has it more flowers upon its banks, these being attributes, which, in strict truth, belong to neither. Fluellin would say, they are as like as my fingers to my fingers, and there is salmon in both. It is a noble stream to bathe in, and I shall make that use of it three times a week, having introduced myself to it for the first time this morning.'

دو

Lady Hesketh was the last of his female relations whom he had seen before he was removed from London to St. Alban's. She was the first to whom he wrote after his recovery. 66 Since

the visit you were so kind to pay me in the Temple," said he', (the only time I ever saw you without pleasure), what have I not suffered ! And since it has pleased God to restore me to the use of my reason, what have I not enjoyed! You know by experience how pleasant it is to feel the first approaches of health after a fever;-but oh, the fever of the brain! To feel the quenching of that fire is indeed a blessing which I think it impossible to receive without the most consummate gratitude. Terrible as this chastisement is, I acknowledge in it the hand of an infinite justice; nor is it at all more difficult for me to perceive in it the hand of an infinite mercy likewise. When I consider the effect it has had upon me, I am exceedingly thankful for it, and, without hypocrisy, esteem it the greatest blessing, next to life itself, I have received from the divine bounty. I pray God that I may ever retain this sense of it; and then I am sure I shall continue to be, as I am at present, really happy.

"I write thus to you, that you may not think me a forlorn and wretched creature; which you might be apt to do, considering my very distant removal from every friend I have in the world; a circumstance which, before this event befell me, would undoubtedly have made me so; but my affliction has taught me a road to happiness, which without I should never have found. You may now inform all those whom you think really interested in my welfare, that they have no need to be apprehensive on the score of my happiness at present. And you yourself will believe that my happiness is no dream, because I have told you the foundation on which it is built."

"a

To this letter Cowper received an immediate reply, .. “ friendly and comfortable" reply, he calls it, for which as immediately he thanked his dear cousin. Again he alluded to their last interview. "What, ," said he, "could you think of my unaccountable behaviour to you on that visit. I remember I neither spoke to you, nor looked at you. The solution of the mystery, indeed, followed soon after; but at the time it must have been inexplicable. The uproar within was even then begun, and my silence was only the sulkiness of a thunder-storm before it opens. I am glad, however, that the only instance in which I knew not how to value your company, was when I was not in my senses. It was the first of

7 July 6, 1765.

Twenty

the kind, and I trust in God in will be the last." years later, when after a long cessation his intercourse with this beloved kinswoman was renewed, Cowper again reminded her of that painful interview, which had left upon his mind an indelible impression: "You do not forget, I dare say, that you and Sir Thomas called upon me in my chambers, a very few days before I took leave of London. Then it was that I saw you last; and then it was that I said in my heart, upon your going out at the door, Farewell! there will be no more intercourse between us,-for ever" !"

He had not written to her from St. Alban's when assured of his recovery, because he was willing to perform quarantine first, both for his own sake, and because he thought his letters would be more satisfactory to her from any other quarter. All was sunshine with him now. He liked the place extremely, as far as he was acquainted with it. For one who had so long lived in chambers it was no discomfort to be alone in lodgings. It was in the height of summer, he was fond of bathing, and there was the Ouse at hand. "Here is a card assembly," he writes to Mr. Hill 10, "and a dancing assembly, and a horse race, and a club, and a bowling-green, so that I am well off, you perceive, in point of diversions; especially as I shall go to 'em just as much as I should if I lived a thousand miles off. But no matter for that; the spectator at a play is more entertained than the actor, and in real life it is much the same. You will say, perhaps, that if I never frequent these places I shall not come within the description of a spectator; and you will say right. I have made a blunder, which shall be corrected in the next edition."

The first visit he received was from his woollen-draper, “a very healthy, wealthy, sensible, sponsible man, and extremely civil," who offered him the use of a cold bath, and promised to get him the St. James's Chronicle, and to do him every service in his power. Soon afterwards Mr. Hodgson, the clergyman of the parish, called upon him, "a good preacher, a conscientious minister, and a very sensible man.” Cowper neither sought society, nor shunned it at this time; he was in that happy state of mind which can enjoy fit company, and yet feel no want of it in solitude. In his daily walk, his weekly meeting with his brother, and his correspondence with Nov. 23, 1785, 10 July 3.

8 July 4.

Hill, the most intimate and faithful of his friends, and with Lady Hesketh, who after his attachment to her sister had been violently broken, had become to him the dearest of his relations, he found sufficient occupation and amusement.

"As Mr. Quin," he said, "very roundly expressed himself upon some such occasion, here is very plentiful accommodation, and great happiness of provision; so that if I starve, it must be through forgetfulness, rather than scarcity""" But never having been accustomed to take thought for himself about these things, he felt the discomfort of his way of life, before he discovered its improvidence. "Whatever you may think of the matter," said he to his friend Hill, "it is no such easy thing to keep house for two people. A man cannot always live like the lions in the Tower; and a joint of meat in so small a family is an endless incumbrance. In short I never

knew how to pity poor housekeepers before; but now I cease to wonder at that politic cast which their occupation usually gives to their countenance, for it is really a matter full of perplexity 12"

The state of his finances at this time, though it was far from easy, seems to have caused him little anxiety. "You know, Joe," he says, "I am very deep in debt to my little physician at St. Alban's, and that the handsomest thing I can do will be to pay him le plutôt qu'il sera possible, (this is vile French, I believe, but you can, now, correct it.) My brother informs me that you have such a quantity of cash in your hands, on my account, that I may venture to send him forty pounds immediately. This, therefore, I shall be obliged if you will manage for me; and when you receive the hundred pounds, which my brother likewise brags you are shortly to receive, I shall be glad if you will discharge the remainder of that debt, without waiting for any further advice from your humble servant 13"

The rent of his chambers in the Temple constituted part of the resources upon which he reckoned; but the person who had entered upon them was one who found it convenient to postpone payment till it should be forced from him, and Cowper was compelled to call in the professional assistance of his friend Hill 14. "You are an old dog," he says, 66 at a bad 12 To Mr. Hill, July 3.

11 To Lady Hesketh, July 5. 13 To Mr. Hill, Aug. 14.

14 July 3.