4 lessness and guilt, and in a consequent subjugation of the will, and in a disposition for labor and active exertion, I am inclined to think myself gaining ground. My soul approves thoroughly the life of God, and my one only desire is to be entirely devoted to him; and O may I live very near to him in the ensuing year, and follow the steps of Christ and his holy saints. I have resigned in profession the riches, the honors, and the comforts of this world; and I think also it is a resignation of the heart." Then, after having set apart a day for fasting and prayer, he besought God "for understanding and strength, to fit him for a long life of warfare and constant self-denial; and that he might see clearly why he was placed here, how short the time was, and how excellent to labor for souls, and, above all, to feel his desert of hell."-He prayed also for grace, "to enlighten him in the dark seasons of trouble and desponding faith; that he might not shrink from cold, and hunger, and painful labor, but follow the Lamb whithersoever he went." His soul longed for perfection, but he "feared that he had not yet learned the secret of happiness-a poor and contrite spirit." In the early part of the year 1804, Mr. Martyn's expectations of becoming a Missionary were considerably damped by the very trying event of his losing all his slender patrimony; a loss rendered more severe to him by the circumstance of his youngest sister being involved in the same calamity. His designs of leaving England were, in consequence of this disaster, likely to be frustrated: for his pecuniary resources were cut off, and it appeared to him scarcely justifiable to leave his sister in actual distress, when his presence in England might alleviate or remove it. In order, therefore, that he might consult some of his friends in this emergency, at the end of June he left Cambridge for London. The situation of a Chaplain to the East India Company had long appeared to many of those who took a lively interest in him and his work, to be peculiarly eligible, as offering singular facilities for Missionary exertions amongst millions of Idolaters. The pecuniary advantages of the appointment were at first wholly out of their contemplation; and for himself, when it was intimated to him that there was some expectation of his leaving England in the capacity of Chaplain to the East India Companyhis private Journal contains this remarkable reflection.-"The prospect of this world's happiness gave me rather pain than pleasure, which convinced me that I had been running away from the world rather than overcoming it."-That unexpected change which had now taken place in Mr. Martyn's circumstances caused an increased anxiety amongst his friends to procure, if possible, the appointment which before they had deemed so desirable; and. they were not without hopes of seeing the Mission Church at Calcutta placed under his pastoral super intendence. Insuperable obstacles however interfered with this arrangement, and "a veil was thus cast over his future proceedings." The patience which Mr. Martyn manifested under this disappointment was as edifying and extraordinary, as the watchfulness which he exercised over his mind during his visit to London, lest scenes so different from those of Cambridge should prove to him a source of distraction and dissipation. He speaks at this time of returning on one occasion to his room, after having been much abroad and making many visits, "unable to remain in an unholy dissipated state: and seeking God earnestly in prayer." Whilst waiting at the India House, he employed that time, for which he says he would have given any thing at Cambridge, in private ejaculatory prayer, and in repeating passages from the word of God;—and yet, though he ever aimed at an entire abstraction from the vanities of the world, he hesitated not to allow himself the full enjoyment of rational and refined gratifications:-his observations on this head are well worth recording: "Since I have known God in a saving manner," he remarks, "painting, poetry, and music, have had charms unknown to me before-I have received what I suppose is a taste for them; for religion has refined my mind, and made it susceptible of impressions from the sublime and beautiful. O how religion secures the heightened enjoyment of those pleasures which keep so many from God, by their becoming a source of pride.” Unable at present to discern the cloud which should conduct him on his way, Mr. Martyn resumed his ministerial functions at Cambridge with ardor, but with a heavy heart.—The affairs of his family, affecting as they did his own destination as well as his sister's happiness, were no light pressure upon his spirits; in any other point of view they would scarcely have raised a sigh, and certainly would not greatly have disturbed his composure. But when "most oppressed," he was enabled to find comfort in reflecting, that "even such a condition was infinitely preferable to that of those, whose minds were discontented in the pursuit of dangerous trifles." The words of the wise man, that "the day of death is better than the day of one's birth," can apply only to those who practically discern in the light of the Scriptures the great end of their existence. This subject was ever in Mr. Martyn's contemplation; and that he might more closely consider the object for which he was created, he never failed of making a particular commemoration of the anniversary of his birth. "Twenty-three years have elapsed," (he wrote on the 18th of February, 1804,) "since I saw the light-only four of which have been professedly given to God-much has been left undone-much remains to be done as a Christian and Minister: yet my past experience of the long suffering of God leaves me no doubt of being carried on all the way. I feel that my heart is wholly for heaven, and the world mainly behind my back. Praised be the Lord for his mercy and patience! The number of my days is fixed in his purpose:-O may I 'glorify him on earth, and finish the work he has given me to do!" " In the interval which passed between the months of February and June, he was found actively laboring in the service of his divine Master. He preached animating and awakening discourses; he excited societies of private Christians to "watch, quit themselves like men, and be strong." he visited many of the poor, the afflicted and the dying: he warned numbers of the careless and profligate-in a word, he did the work of an Evangelist. Often did he redeem time from study, from recreation, and from the intercourse of friends, that, like his Redeemer, he might enter the abodes of misery, either to arouse the unthinking slumberer, or to administer consolation to the dejected penitent. Many an hour did he pass in an hospital or an alms-houseand often, after a day of labor and fatigue, when wearied almost to an extremity of endurance, he would read and pray with the servant who had the care of his rooms, thus making it his meat and drink, his rest as well as his labor, to do the will of his heavenly Father, in conformity to the example of Christ:— "His care was fixed To fill his odorous lamp with deeds of light, |